After an amazing interview with one of Vegas and San Fran’s top radio morning shows this morning with Elvis and The Dog House (Lasted about 11 minutes, and they really seemed consumed with the progress of “The Journey”, the amazing lifestyle I live, and what separates me from the Gen Pop, but I can’t find a podcast to put here), I ran to the gym to drop an hour of intense working out (I was lax this weekend because I was waking up with various hot girls in my bed for 2 straight days and even though my shoulders, arms, and chest still look great, my abs suck, and I have been too consumed with business and The Craft, and not paying enough attention to what one girl this weekend called, “The Best Body I have ever seen in that towel pic in your portfolio.” I have had artists offer me money to draw or sculpt my body because it’s proportions are so dynamic and rare, and I think I get so used to having the ability to “Rip Down” at will that I put work and sex ahead of taking care of myself sometimes), and finally cleared the release of my next big announcement (I told a friend what it was and he said, “That is really cool. You really are doing this. I can’t wait to see people’s reactions when you put it on the blog”), and am now in the process of finalizing the final touches on my Press/Blog release, but it feels so good to finally be able to drop my next bomb after the monumental announcement of my “Dev Deal” with “Entertainment Powerhouse” IMG Media, and then the buzz that was created when a production crew was with me a week and a half ago. I have been getting emails, phone calls, and people coming up to me asking non-stop what the big announcement is, and it is finally great to share it with Kade Nation, but it’s still like the moment when you know you are going to ejaculate, but you’re still holding it for a few more seconds for maximum enjoyment.
My Girlfriend said to me, “Everyone is talking about you. It feels like the Phillies are competing with you sometimes. I was at a bar, and a whole discussion came up about you while the Phillies were playing”, and I responded, “It’s weird, but I feel like I am the biggest story in the city for months. I guess my 15 minutes is sure lasting a lot longer than any of The Haters thought it would. I can’t wait until I am on that podium thanking the Academy because there will still be haters trying to figure out why I don’t deserve the award, but as long as they are paying $11 to watch me, I don’t really care”. I learned a long time ago that Gen Pop can hate when you’re better, but in the end they are truly cheering for you to cheer up their own mundane and boring lives.
I have decided to make the HUGE announcement on Wednesday at noon, as a lunch time gift to Kade Nation on the East Coast, but I do promise that it is another step towards the worldwide domination that The Brand has created, and it will delight all of my fans around the world. I was even debating contacting media sources and holding a small press conference (I can’t even imagine how many fans would attend, but it would be like everything else I do, EPIC) at a cool location, but I have so much to do over the next few days that are Craft related (I have Sharon tomorrow, and then an audition for a TV show in NYC on Weds. morning that I am have been preparing for for 2 weeks, followed by hustling back for My taping with Mike Lemon at 6PM of the scene from Heist where he told me, “You are becoming a pretty damn good Film Actor”).
I also have this Philly 9.35 sweating me like a sauna (We made out 2 weeks ago while drunk, and she has an amazing body, great perky fake boobs, and long legs ((Although I feel like she may be a bit knockkneed, which I asked my girlfriend about and she said, “You are such an asshole. She has great legs”)) but I told her that she needs a little Botox in her forehead and around the eyes and skin treatment because she looks 3-5 years older than she is and that would a problem for me showing her off in public) who keeps sweating me that I told tonight, “You want to be taken seriously, but I know 2 guys who took you down, and I can’t touch you knowing that”, and she responded, “I don’t understand why my past is such a big deal?”, and I told her, “I don’t do sloppy seconds, and all I would think about while having sex with you is how you moaned when you were with those guys. I just don’t even want to deal with it when I can have pretty much any girl I want, and I will sleep with you and never call you again”. I am not sure she liked that comment, but she did say, “I don’t know whether I hate you, or feel like I need to see a plastic surgeon now?” Better luck next time babe.
“The Gen Pop gets scared when someone is doing the impossible, but they worship you when you have done the impossible. Welcome to Kadealot”…Arthur Kade…10/19/09
Kudos,
Rubia has left for the day but mentioned you wanted her to assist someone in submitting a Darwin Award? I’m on the site and don’t know what you would like her to convey. She understands that you all feel she’s incompetent and ponderous but would you like me to incoporate her and this other individual, or shall I submit awards separately?
Please advise. Thanks, Rubia’s assistant.
@Stace,
Let me help… I think you can start here:
There’s a common story told in introductory reference classes. A patron comes to the reference desk and asks for a book called “Oranges and Peaches.” The librarian has never heard of the book before, but does a quick search in the catalog. Nothing. A quick search on Amazon offers some possibilities, but, no. Nothing. Rather than send the patron away, the librarian probes the patron for more information about the book.
L: Can you tell me what the book is about?
P: No idea.
L: Hmmm. How did you hear about it?
P: My co-hater assigned it. I have to blob about it for a blob.
L: Which class are you taking?
P: Blobology.
L: Could it be Darwin’s Origin of Species?
King Midas!
a play in three acts
act one
(the stage is empty. a little boy wearing a paper crown enters )
YOUNG MIDAS – Hello?
act two
(Young Midas is now a man. his nostrils have grown considerably since act one)
MIDAS – I’m a king.
THE INTERNETS – Really?
MIDAS – Yes!
THE INTERNETS – Prove it.
MIDAS – Very well. Here is a picture of my half-eaten breakfast.
THE INTERNETS – That’s ridiculous.
MIDAS – Food prepared for, and eaten by me. Your king.
THE INTERNETS – Are you kidding?
MIDAS – You’ve been Midasized!
THE INTERNETS – What does that mean?
MIDAS – I made it up. Based on my name.
act three
(the future. King Midas is wearing a fedora)
KING MIDAS – (pause) What has happened to me?
@ Stacy V. …
Thank you for your quick response on La Rubia’s behalf. In reference as to what I am referring to; The Darwin Award is given to individuals whom remove themselves from the gene pool before procreating. Most often it involves a fatal mishap incurred through stupidity and leaves others unharmed.
Mr. McFucknuts wants recognition and attention desperately, to the point of winning an award. His achievement of this goal appears unlikely, given his lack of anything remotely resembling talent. But the Darwin Award is within his reach, and I am sure with a little coaching, it could be his crowning achievement.
So, I respectfully request that La Rubia would see fit to suggest various methods McFuck might use to fulfill the requirements necessary (the most important being death, of course) to earn at least nomination for this award.
Thank you for your assistance, I will patently await your response.
Kudos
Ho-hum, the same post, again and again.
Another post about how great you will be at an audition — but then you NEVER get the part, and never mention it again.
Another post about how you can sleep with any girl you want, how every girl wants you, yet you don’t get laid in the end, so you make up an excuse about how you didn’t want her anyhow. Just like a member of the high school chess club who claims that he didn’t bang the cheerleader because he didn’t want to do it.
Sure Artie, whatever you need to tell yourself to get through the day without committing suicide.
Seriously, fear factor for dating? Why do you hate women so much? Is it because you’re maybe afraid to have any kind of real interaction with them?
I am the most interesting drunk in the world. That’s why I drink Pabst.
Arthur it is i, confucious
Strategy without tactics is the slowest route to victory. Tactics without strategy is the noise before defeat
You are on the path of certain self-destruction
Speaking of Octomom, think of all the Kade-filled diapers she has to deal with every day. Her entire house must smell like pee and Kade.
cause you have neither. fucking cunt
arthur your journey is similar to the one a dead goldfish makes as its flushed down the toilet.
you just keep spinning and sooner or later youll just dissappear.
better sooner than later. die
Yo, I showed this site to a group of friends expectings your posts to be filled with their usual bullshit that makes us laugh…
but instead they were just like, “who is this loser” and went back to watching “Dogs getting shotguns jammed up their asses”..i think you are featured there.
They didnt even laugh. you let me down arthur. Im not longer your nubmer one fan and alas, i must beg everyone: feel for Arthur.
Its not nice to make fun of the mentally handicapped ladies and gents. so drive safe (unless you see Arthur. Swerve. Towards him. Goodnight)
so i read your blog in its entirity.
Needless to say, you are an even bigger fucking cunt than i could have ever imagined.
When are you going to realize that the jokes on you. rapist bastard son of the russian abortionist.
The earth need to be erased of this grotesque (mentally and physically) living full-time troll.
Every breath is another thing you dont deserve. You have no future. Your name and that of your family is marred. You have no ability apart from being able to induce projectile vomiting and repulsiveness.
you deserve to be gutted like a fish.
@ Carlos from Philly…
”
SEPTEMBER 29TH, 2009 AT 5:46 AM
wwkd said:
Hey! Look way way way way in the back! It’s Philly’s biggest douchebag, ArthurKade of Arthurkade.com.”
uh, Arthur is a piece of shit-! Plain & simple. He’s got a “b” list friend that encourages him and has him convinced that he is a “genius,” but the fact of the matter is that as repulsive as he was before too women even “king” Arthur has out done even himself. Now crack whore prostitues won’t even tou ch him. I can’t even begin to tell you how pathetic he is out. He’ll order a Drink & ask for it for free. He is scum.
are terrible! you suck. The world hates you.
@ Cheese-tastic
Your three act play was brilliant! You made me splurt my beer.
And who’s bored with this shithole?
Weeeeeeeee!
WE ARE. Yeah.
I am bored to death La Rubia. The kade train is runnin’ out of steam and it hasn’t even pulled out of the station.
Hey,
Did ya here me?
You can’t be serious.
Arthur Kade <3 8====D
Dont worry about the “haters” arthur. well be gone. cause youre gonna die alone.
fucking loser
How the fuck is he avoiding the inevitable beat down he deserves? It’s ‘amazing’ that it hasn’t happened yet. I know it’s got to happen sooner or later. Sooner would be better. Somebody (anybody) smacking him and saying “Blog that, bitch” would melt my butter. I’d pay $11.00 to see that. (Alright, I’d pay more, a lot more)
To whom it may concern,
Just because McFucknuts acts and talks effeminate, you may punch him without feeling like you’re hitting a girl. He’ll squeal like a girl, but don’t let it bother you. Thank you.
Hitting the Franklin Mortgage & Investment Company?
Ain’t even worth a comment anymore.
God, I hope you die a grisly death.
Never again will I return to this site. Take heed people. He loves this shit.
Hey Kade,
Is your next big announcement that you got a lifetime ban from The Franklin for being a cheap fuck and never paying your bar tab? Cause I think that’s what you should talk about. If anyone wants to read the story check it out here…
http://www.philebrity.com/2009/10/14/here-is-what-we-know-about-arthur-kade-being-banned-for-life-from-the-franklin/
The dominos are starting to fall Artie. Before long, all the clubs in Philly will get wise to your bullshit. Have fun getting drunk at one less spot in the city:)
-Kevin
Arthur, every day of The Journey, brings you one step closer to your ultimate failure as a human being.
The Truth About Arthur Kade’s Franklin Mortgage & Investment Company Ban
By now most of you have read that Arthur Kade was banned for life from the recently opened Franklin Mortgage & Investment Company, a nightclub in Philadelphia. It was reported on Philebrity.com here, and refers to an interview with bartender Colin Shearn on philadelphia.grubstreet.com. In the article, Colin throws in the following gems:
Your worst customer in five words or less: Arthur Kade. Seriously, he is everything that’s wrong with this city.
What’s the worst thing you’ve ever seen at your bar?: Arthur Kade. Don’t worry, he’s now banned for life.
Thanks to an anonymous tipster, we now know that Arthur was banned from The Franklin for basically being a cheap fuck, and a liar. Surprised? From what we’re told, Kade lied to bartenders about being comped by the owners/managers, and never paid his tab. No idea on the amount of said unpaid tab, but all those Red Bulls sure add up fast! Actually, The Franklin seems like the kind of bar that wouldn’t even have Red Bull, so no telling what he was drinking and refusing to pay for.
Our tipster also mentioned that Kade isn’t even allowed in front of the bar. Bouncers actually mentioned this to our tipster as Kade walked by last Friday night – they won’t even allow him to stop and talk to anyone there!
Keep in mind this is the establishment that Kade bragged about receiving a “hand delivered VIP only invite to their opening over the summer. Way to wear out your welcome Arthur!
We also have it on good authority that Arthur is soon to be banned from another Philly nightspot, for reasons as simple as being himself. We’ll wait and see if it pans out and let you know when it does!
Here’s to hoping this trend continues, and Philly’s “favorite son” (gag) is soon banished from every eatery, club, and street corner in the city.
What I just posted above is up over at:
http://legowigkade.blogspot.com/2009/10/truth-about-arthur-kades-franklin.html
on the http://www.legowigkade.blogspot.com website.
@MC 900 Foot Douchebag
Beautiful post. This is the stuff that dreams (or nightmares?) are made of. One step closer to failure Arthur… again, I mean as a human being.
Arthur, I appreciated the reappearance of food pictures in your last post. It’s good to know that you’re no longer on a hunger strike. The corn chips and salsa were particularly impressive. Were they comped? That shit’s spicy dawg!
Arthur: the ultimate ‘plus one’-comped-guest-of-the-party-planner-sleeping-on-the-floor-no-tipping-never-buys-a-round FUCKING CUNT
hey Arthur . . . . people HATE YOU
PEOPLE HATE YOU
@Jasorb…
That is up over at http://www.legowigkade.com
This may or may not get through as I’m being moderated now…
@Monologur
I’m not sure I “hate” Arthur. I just have less than no respect for him. How can someone turn into such a reprehensible clown? Maybe he’s drinking tainted Red Bull and it’s starting to effect his brain. Arthur: for gawd’s sake stop the insanity! It too funny!
Bullet points…
Agahahhaaaaa. That guy is almost better than Arthur!
aren’t we less than an hour away from the big announcement? i’ve been saving my lunch all day!
@jasorb
yeah I hate Arthur in as much a way as I can to someone whom I don;t actually know
still, I HATE people like him: Entitled Cunts. do-nothings. liars. non-tippers. empty braggarts. loud mouths. pieces of fucking shit . . . etc
hey Arthur, FUCK YOU
@Cheese-eazy,
What announcement? There’s an announcement?
Oh you mean the guy who blo..b, the..g.uy, delu..ded…
Zzzzzzzzzz.
ARTHUR,
I’VE GOT A LUNCHTIME APPPOINTMENT. SORRY I’LL HAVE TO MISS YOUR “”"””"BIG ANNOUNCEMENT””"”" AT NOON. ACTUALLY I SCHEDULED THIS SO THAT I COULD FORCE MYSELF TO MISS YOUR ANNOUNCEMENT AND SHOW YOU THAT YOU’RE UNLOVED.
ENJOY YOUR PATHETIC NEED FOR ME TO VALIDATE YOUR LIFE, YOU FUCKING WASTE OF CUMB FAILURE.
I’M SURE THAT WHEN I SEE THIS BULLSHIT ANNOUNCEMENT IT’LL BE AS FUCKING WORTHLESS AS ANYTHING ELSE YOU’VE EVER DONE, YOU WORTHLESS FAILURE. AND I’LL JUST BE MORE DEPRESSED ABOUT THE FACT THAT MY DNA TURNED INTO YOU.
SINCERELY
YOUR DAD.
@ Kudos
Kade is a delusional misogynist with nothing to offer humanity. But I have to say that encouraging a beat down for him is over the top. He doesn’t deserve that. Hopefully one day someone will get through to him and he’ll see what a complete fool he’s made of himself. I imagine, if that ever happens – If he’s even capable of seeing himself the way others see him – that will be a very bad day.
But no one should call for or condone violence against Kade or anyone else for that matter. This site is fun, and shouldn’t take a turn toward that.
Arthur debates holding a press conference
Arthur: Hmm, maybe I should hold a press conference
Arthur: How would you do that?
Arthur: East, contact media sources…let my fans know..it would be epic.
Arthur: Let’s do it! Where’s my Kadeberry?
Arthur: Wait, hold on…I have a lot going on the next couple days.
Arthur: Like what?
Arthur: Sharon tomorrow, and audition on Thursday in NYC..
Arthur: You’ve been preparing for that for two weeks!
Arthur: And then I have to hustle back here for Lemon.
Arthur: Plus that Philly 9.35 is sweating me like a sauna..
Arthur: She’s a bit knockkneed.
Arthur: You are such an asshole! She has great legs!
Arthur: It would be a problem showing her off in public.
Arthur: Oops oops you’re on my hair!
Arthur: Plus, I can’t take her seriously because I know two guys who took her down.
Arthur: Yuck! I don’t do sloppy second!
Arthur: Don’t you mean sloppy thirds?
Both Arthurs: Ha ha ha ha ha!
all it takes is a car and a closed garage.
Just remember folks, Arthur has admitted to drug use in his 20s at least three times now. This would have occurred while he was employed, and likely by Ameriprise.
The trail he is paving for himself will never be erased.
funny as hell Cheese-tastic
bravo!!
Today’s Gawker Online:
Gawker
By Hamilton Nolan
‘Arthur Kade Just About Ready to Bend Over’
Bitches want Philly fakeball Arthur Kade to take them to dinner in order to get inside their drawers. That’s not Kade Style; but his little SEX DROUGHT is getting pretty bad. How bad?
with The Drought having hit 8 months, and having gone 8 for 8 the last 3 weeks in hooking up with girls and not having penal insertion, it is really testing my patience that I may have to bend over and maybe compromise my values to do this “Dinner thing”.
And then he does this freestyle as “The Kween.” That bad.